Monday, November 24, 2014

Being Highly Motivated: Why It's A Blessing & A Curse

"I wish I were as motivated as you".

People look to me and tell me this pretty frequently. I am so flattered when people smile and tell me this. However, it took me years and a lot of self-reflection to realize that "motivation" doesn't lead to happiness. Living a meaningful life leads to happiness. Let me explain...
When I am extremely motivated nothing gets in the way of me and my goal. My goals come first, and life pretty much comes second. When I am super set on a goal I am selfish and my lfe has very little balance. People notice my intense work ethic, because it's hard to miss (I make it my life to execute). 
Let me use fitness as an example. When I have a big fitness goal I will wake up at 5am to do cardio, work all day, workout again at night, cook all my meals, pack them for work, never have anything that isn't weighed out/portioned, and I will turn down any event that gets in the way of my routine.  I never give 80% of my efforts to a goal, I always give 100% without any excuses. This means that I become quite unbalanced with everything else in life. My fitness goals in the past got in the way of ever traveling, going to birthdays, drinking with friends, or doing anything away from my routine.
Another example is my drive to succeed with work. I worked so much after college to show how "motivated & dedicated" I was. I worked nights, weekends, and even when I was on vacation. When I wasn't working I was usually blogging, reading about work stuff, or reaching out to businesses to try to connect. I always thought that the harder I worked the better I was.
WRONG!
Being motivated or more motivated than the person next to you doesn't make you better than them. I remember thinking to myself "you're more motivated & you are willing to do more, so you will go further in life". Again... SO WRONG. Finding balance is way more challenging than finding motivation. Having a life with a successful work, personal, gym, and social life is way more important for happiness. I have learned through my extreme efforts to succeed that it is ok to not drain all of my energy focused on one thing. It's ok to not burn myself out. It's ok to have fun, live life, and do things that may not get me closer to each goal I set. I know myself well. I am able to say that being motivated isn't something I struggle with. However, being balanced is something we all struggle with. I hope you can find your happy balance.

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