Sunday, June 14, 2015

Sunday Reflection: How To Release Stress

What a week. Do you ever look back on your week and realize it went by too fast, you're totally exhausted, or you wish some things panned out differently? Well, you aren't alone. It's totally normal to have so much to do and think about, that it's almost debilitating. Whether it be looking at a calendar full of commitments, an inbox full of emails, or getting screwed over by a significant other or friend. All of these things are somewhat out of our control. They are what they are. They are things you can't fully control. I am not telling you they don't happen to me, but what I am telling you is I've gotten a lot better at dealing with these things in a more calm manner to where they don't stress me out as much.

The nature of my work often has me listening to people complain about their job, relationships, or schedule. I used to be overwhelmed by hearing all this information, but now I totally know how to deal with it. In fact, I feel like I can help people with it. When you become stressed or perceive something as stressful, you typically put a negative label on whatever that stressor is. If it's work you then start to rant about not just that one thing stressing you out, but continue on to talk about the people at work who stress you out & all the little tasks at work that add to your stress. What I've learned is to do a little "exercise" to help my clients and myself perceive that stress for what it is before it escalates. I have them write down everything they are stressed about on a piece of paper and then we chat about it for no more than 5 minutes. Once you write all those things down you then look at them and come up with a plan of attack. For example, one thing that has stressed me out before is a lack of communication with my boss. Once I read it out loud (after telling numerous people) I decided to attack it and stop talking about it. What did I do? I drafted an email to my boss asking for a meeting and vocalized my needs. Right after that email was sent, I became much less stressed. I became at ease, because this was now no longer in my control. I did what I needed to do. Once you do everything in your control to fix a messy situation, you have to release it. You have to move on. Worrying about every little thing you can't control will eat you up inside. It will negatively effect your mood for days; is it really worth it? 
Next time you are sad, stressed, or upset make sure to write it down and work through it ASAP. It just takes a bit of reflection before you can stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on. Don't let it eat you up for weeks and ruin all the positive times you could be experiencing.

Try this exercise. We all have something we haven't released. It's an amazing feeling.

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